Today, Chandler, Rylee, Ashton (Rylee's friend) and I were at Target. As we were just about finishing checking out (I had just finished paying), Rylee picked up a lip gloss out of our basket and said, "Mom, I don't think he charged us for this." We had 3 Baby Lips lip balms in the basket. The checker says he believes he charged us and pulls up the receipt. I quickly look at the receipt and just as soon as I say, "No, I don't see a third one on there, " the woman next in line behind me grabs the lip balm and says, "PUT THIS ON MY BILL...I'M IN A RUSH!!" She GRABS the lip balm and scans the item herself! I was so dumbfounded.. Is this really happening? I said, "Oh, I'm so sorry if we are holding you up, that's not necessary for you to pay for it." She continued to complain about her not having time for us to figure out if we paid for a lip balm or not. She was so nasty about it. I reached into my purse and pulled out the $3 it cost and handed it to her and apologized for holding her up. She shoved the money back at me, saying she didn't want my money. It went back and forth one other time and I could see it turning into one of those whose paying for dinner scenes and as she shoved the money back at me a second time, I decided to take it and leave. Fine, bitch.
It was the strangest encounter I have ever had. I am positive we were making a scene. I think she thought she was doing something nice, as well as making her own life easier. I've been in a position like that before, you get frustrated by being behind someone in line that's taking up more time than you'd like, but geez...calm the f___ down. At least act like you're doing a good deed. I wanted to say, "This does NOT make you a nice (er) person." She could have handled it so differently...and come out smelling like a rose. And avoided making so many of us there feel so awfully uncomfortable.
I hope everyone there thought she was as big of an ass as I thought she was.
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Friday, January 11, 2013
Closer to Home
I read this on a friend's facebook wall today:
"One of the hardest things about becoming adults, is watching our parents grow older, (in some instances) suffer, and leave this earth, when we simply feel, we're just not ready to be without our mamas and daddies."
She took the words right out of my head. Except I don't know that we are ever ready to be without our mamas or daddies.
My heart has been heavy lately. Friends of mine losing a mom, a dad, a brother. Two in the last two weeks. Another a month ago. Several others in the last two years. And others close to me with health scares. Growing up and through the years, people dying or getting sick always happened to someone else...Not so much anymore. It's hitting much closer to home now. Friends I grew up with now losing their parents. As our circle of friends grows and as we grow older ourselves, the inevitable happens. Inevitably it becomes our reality, too.
Whether you know it's coming because of an illness or if it is sudden, I can't even imagine being ready or prepared.
Sending big hugs to my friends and loved ones tonight.
"One of the hardest things about becoming adults, is watching our parents grow older, (in some instances) suffer, and leave this earth, when we simply feel, we're just not ready to be without our mamas and daddies."
She took the words right out of my head. Except I don't know that we are ever ready to be without our mamas or daddies.
My heart has been heavy lately. Friends of mine losing a mom, a dad, a brother. Two in the last two weeks. Another a month ago. Several others in the last two years. And others close to me with health scares. Growing up and through the years, people dying or getting sick always happened to someone else...Not so much anymore. It's hitting much closer to home now. Friends I grew up with now losing their parents. As our circle of friends grows and as we grow older ourselves, the inevitable happens. Inevitably it becomes our reality, too.
Whether you know it's coming because of an illness or if it is sudden, I can't even imagine being ready or prepared.
Sending big hugs to my friends and loved ones tonight.
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Under the Weather
Haven't been feeling great the last few days. Not sleeping well. Burning sore throat. Minor earache and body aches and now coughing for the last 24 hours. No fever but feeling just bad enough to not want to do anything. I suppose if I'm going to be sick, might as well be now. Holidays are over. Projects mostly done. Kids back to school. So, I'm not feeling so guilty about doing pretty much nothing. Hoping I get it all out of my system now and that no one else gets it. And that it stays away...
In my extra free time these last few days, I have been perusing Pinterest and finding and reading up on some new blogs. I'm glad to know there are so many others that blog about their everyday life or whatever journey they are on. And I truly love reading them. Sometimes I wonder if people really care what I write. But, I have 1775 page views, so I guess some people are tuning in. :)
I got homemade chicken soup simmering away, finally. And it smells heavenly. After a few beautiful 70-ish degree days, we have another "cold front" coming in right now. And that's fine by me. As much winter-like weather as we can get, I will take.
Soup will taste good and feel good tonight.
In my extra free time these last few days, I have been perusing Pinterest and finding and reading up on some new blogs. I'm glad to know there are so many others that blog about their everyday life or whatever journey they are on. And I truly love reading them. Sometimes I wonder if people really care what I write. But, I have 1775 page views, so I guess some people are tuning in. :)
I got homemade chicken soup simmering away, finally. And it smells heavenly. After a few beautiful 70-ish degree days, we have another "cold front" coming in right now. And that's fine by me. As much winter-like weather as we can get, I will take.
Soup will taste good and feel good tonight.
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Projects and Other Stuff
I am sure I am like most people and want to start the new year out right...being nice and organized and cleaned out. Over the last few weeks, I have tackled a few projects:
In December we had back-to-back garage sales that were pretty much flops for us. On the bright side, we took every single item that we didn't sell to the rescue mission. This made way for clearing out lots in our garage!
Clean out fridge and freezer: Check.
Clean out pantry: Check.
Clean out laundry room: Check.
Today it was a LOT of laundry.
I've said this before, but I wish I was as organized as I think I am. What it boils down to, is that I hate clutter. I'm fairly good at getting rid of the clutter, just not organizing what's left.
So, next on the list...my closet. I think I am getting close to that happening. Really soon.
Actually, I make it a habit to clean out. About twice a year I do it more "big time." August is the back-to-school cleanout and then there's this New Year cleanout. Feels good. Lightens the stress. It's good chi or something like that, right?
I haven't made public any resolutions I have made. If you really want to know, you can archive my post from last year. I didn't really make good on any of them. So...each new day is a new day to start over and just keep trying to do my best. To make healthier choices. To be a better person. Done with putting too much pressure on myself.
And our little "good things that happened to us box"....only one thing has been written down in 6 days. We need to pay more attention to our days!
Kids are back to school tomorrow and what a great break it's been. Just taking each day as it comes. Three Sundays in a row, a few friends and I have gathered at this area where the kids can ride their Penny boards and bikes and we can sit and have snacks and drinks and enjoy the beautiful day. It's been awesome.
I'm about ready for more of a routine again. But I am sure when those alarms go off at 6:00 am tomorrow that will be another story....
Happy Back to School Day tomorrow!
In December we had back-to-back garage sales that were pretty much flops for us. On the bright side, we took every single item that we didn't sell to the rescue mission. This made way for clearing out lots in our garage!
Clean out fridge and freezer: Check.
Clean out pantry: Check.
Clean out laundry room: Check.
Today it was a LOT of laundry.
I've said this before, but I wish I was as organized as I think I am. What it boils down to, is that I hate clutter. I'm fairly good at getting rid of the clutter, just not organizing what's left.
So, next on the list...my closet. I think I am getting close to that happening. Really soon.
Actually, I make it a habit to clean out. About twice a year I do it more "big time." August is the back-to-school cleanout and then there's this New Year cleanout. Feels good. Lightens the stress. It's good chi or something like that, right?
I haven't made public any resolutions I have made. If you really want to know, you can archive my post from last year. I didn't really make good on any of them. So...each new day is a new day to start over and just keep trying to do my best. To make healthier choices. To be a better person. Done with putting too much pressure on myself.
And our little "good things that happened to us box"....only one thing has been written down in 6 days. We need to pay more attention to our days!
Kids are back to school tomorrow and what a great break it's been. Just taking each day as it comes. Three Sundays in a row, a few friends and I have gathered at this area where the kids can ride their Penny boards and bikes and we can sit and have snacks and drinks and enjoy the beautiful day. It's been awesome.
I'm about ready for more of a routine again. But I am sure when those alarms go off at 6:00 am tomorrow that will be another story....
Happy Back to School Day tomorrow!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
A New Year
It's hard to believe that another year has come and gone. I just re-read a post that I wrote on New Year's last year and it seems like it was just yesterday.
2012 has been a really good year. Many great things have happened, along with some challenges.
I began my first year of nursing school in January. There is no one word that can describe this journey of going back to school. Exciting. Scary. Amazing. Daunting. I am continually motivated and encouraged by nurses who are working who relay stories of feeling the same way my fellow classmates and I feel about what we are going through. I have made some wonderful new friendships along the way. New sisters and brothers with whom we all share this bond. I've met people who have come and gone from my life, too, during this process, and I'm not going to lie: It's made me sad to lose some friends with whom I felt had a connection. Doesn't matter how old we get, still hurts.
Along the road of 2012, Chandler broke her nose and Craig rolled a golf cart and had a nasty injury to his lower leg. Chandler had surgery and Craig was darn lucky, to say the least.
We had a fun cheer season, traveling with super fun parents, who know how to have a great time and make the best of every situation!
This year, I was fortunate to be able to visit with old friends. Whether it was catching up for 30 minutes at a cheer competition, or for a few hours with margaritas, poolside. Or for 10 minutes at a tailgate orlunch or spending a weekend together. I am grateful for true friendships and for those who make the time and go out of their way to make the connection happen. And not to mention the priceless moments with good girlfriends here...laughing til we cry. Yes, I've had a broken heart or two this year, but these moments make up for them ten-fold.
We took a wonderful trip to Lake Tahoe in July. It was a perfectly wonderful vacation, complete with good family time, horseback riding and lots of time on the lake. And seeing old friends again.
We made a few day trips to the beach and soaked up every bit of being in the sun and sand.
And how can I forget going to Dallas Cowboys Training Camp?? Woot woot!
Rylee turned 13 and Chandler turned 18. Chandler registered and voted in her first election. And got her first job. It was all very exciting.
I was awarded over $6000 in scholarships for nursing school, which took me by complete surprise. What a blessing that was for us....
In November, Chandler and I traveled to Norman for a campus visit of OU. An awesome trip all around.
Sure, we had our not so shining moments, too. There has been stress and feelings of not being so much at peace with various things. But, overall, it's been a very positive year for our family...and we must all recognize the positive, because it is too easy to let the other fester and take over.
I read my new year's resolutions from last year and I regret to say that I wasn't so successful at keeping most of them. So, this year, I keep trying. And for the new year, something new for us to do: I have a little box with a notepad in it. Each time something good or positive comes along our way, we will write it down and put it in the box. At the end of the year, we will sit and read about them together. I am so looking forward to that. A great way to focus on the positive through the year.
I might add that 2013 is a big year for us:
Rylee will finish middle school. Chandler will graduate from high school. Craig turns the big 5-0. We will celebrate our 20th anniversary and I will wrap up the year when I graduate from nursing school!! Wow!
Can hardly wait!
2012 has been a really good year. Many great things have happened, along with some challenges.
I began my first year of nursing school in January. There is no one word that can describe this journey of going back to school. Exciting. Scary. Amazing. Daunting. I am continually motivated and encouraged by nurses who are working who relay stories of feeling the same way my fellow classmates and I feel about what we are going through. I have made some wonderful new friendships along the way. New sisters and brothers with whom we all share this bond. I've met people who have come and gone from my life, too, during this process, and I'm not going to lie: It's made me sad to lose some friends with whom I felt had a connection. Doesn't matter how old we get, still hurts.
Along the road of 2012, Chandler broke her nose and Craig rolled a golf cart and had a nasty injury to his lower leg. Chandler had surgery and Craig was darn lucky, to say the least.
We had a fun cheer season, traveling with super fun parents, who know how to have a great time and make the best of every situation!
This year, I was fortunate to be able to visit with old friends. Whether it was catching up for 30 minutes at a cheer competition, or for a few hours with margaritas, poolside. Or for 10 minutes at a tailgate orlunch or spending a weekend together. I am grateful for true friendships and for those who make the time and go out of their way to make the connection happen. And not to mention the priceless moments with good girlfriends here...laughing til we cry. Yes, I've had a broken heart or two this year, but these moments make up for them ten-fold.
We took a wonderful trip to Lake Tahoe in July. It was a perfectly wonderful vacation, complete with good family time, horseback riding and lots of time on the lake. And seeing old friends again.
We made a few day trips to the beach and soaked up every bit of being in the sun and sand.
And how can I forget going to Dallas Cowboys Training Camp?? Woot woot!
Rylee turned 13 and Chandler turned 18. Chandler registered and voted in her first election. And got her first job. It was all very exciting.
I was awarded over $6000 in scholarships for nursing school, which took me by complete surprise. What a blessing that was for us....
In November, Chandler and I traveled to Norman for a campus visit of OU. An awesome trip all around.
Sure, we had our not so shining moments, too. There has been stress and feelings of not being so much at peace with various things. But, overall, it's been a very positive year for our family...and we must all recognize the positive, because it is too easy to let the other fester and take over.
I read my new year's resolutions from last year and I regret to say that I wasn't so successful at keeping most of them. So, this year, I keep trying. And for the new year, something new for us to do: I have a little box with a notepad in it. Each time something good or positive comes along our way, we will write it down and put it in the box. At the end of the year, we will sit and read about them together. I am so looking forward to that. A great way to focus on the positive through the year.
I might add that 2013 is a big year for us:
Rylee will finish middle school. Chandler will graduate from high school. Craig turns the big 5-0. We will celebrate our 20th anniversary and I will wrap up the year when I graduate from nursing school!! Wow!
Can hardly wait!
Friday, December 14, 2012
Catching Up
Last time I sat down to write a post was in October. I had started a post all about Chandler. She turned 18 on October 19th. Too many thoughts, too much to write and I got sidetracked. So, if anyone has any patience, this could be a marathon-catch up post.
I wrote about Rylee's birth story, so with Chandler's permission, I get to write a little about her. My due date for Chandler was October 25th. I stopped working right around the 15th. Doing last minute things to "get ready." On the morning of the 18th, I had taken my car in to get new tires. They ended up telling me that I needed all this other work done on the car. At the time, we could only afford the new tires, and I drove home in tears and called Craig to tell him. He got mad at me. He was mad that I would be so upset, as he figures mechanics warn you about all the things you "need" but don't really need. He came home from work and we weren't really speaking. I made dinner, had baked chocolate chip cookies from scratch and went to bed. Long story short, my water broke about midnight. We drove to the hospital still without speaking.
Once we were at the hospital and I got all situated, Craig fell asleep. OK...I guess I tried to understand and cut him some slack? It was 2:30 am, after all....
At 6:30 and with my contractions getting stronger, I decided it was time for him to WAKE UP. I had made a decision that I thought I could do this without an epidural. My doctor came in around 8:00 and I couldn't even focus on anything he was saying. I was in miserable pain. He left and my nurse strongly encouraged me to get the epidural. Around 9:30, I was begging for it. Ah...what a relief. My nurse, by the way...loved her. She was amazing and it is memories of her being with me that inspire me in my new chapter of life.
Chandler was born at 2:21 pm. After talks of possible c-section, I was able to push my little 6lb 6oz girl out. We didn't know what we were having, so this was a beautiful surprise. There were a lot of tears in that room that afternoon...
Chandler was a beautiful, sweet, quiet baby. Don't get me wrong...she cried. A lot. But, she was quiet like a mouse. Shy. Cautious. Soft spoken. Gentle. Afraid to do anything wrong. She's still very much like this to this day. More than anything, I pray that she (and Rylee, too) are happy. That Craig and I have done everything we can to raise confident, strong, caring, giving, happy girls.
I kind of worried about her 18th birthday. Her very best friend is on the east coast. Her other good friend had recently moved away, and she had just broken up with her boyfriend. Her birthday fell on a Friday. So, with about 18 of her fellow cheerleader/sisters, we all went to dinner and followed that with them cheering at the football game. It was a great night. I think she was a happy girl.
In November, Chandler and I took a trip to Norman, Oklahoma to visit the OU campus. For the longest time, Chandler has had no idea where she wants to attend college. She's a homebody. She gets homesick and a little nervous being away from home. But, the more we talked about it, the greater her interest in OU became. I figured it was worth a trip for her to see what a bigger school was like.
It was a great mom-daughter trip. We stayed with our dear friends, the Youngs. Craig's sister, Jana, drove us around Norman and attended the tour with us. Friends (the Johnsons) we met in Tulsa met us for lunch and the tour, as well. My dear friend,Traci, from Texas Tech happened to be in town, as well, and met up with me for a quick 15 minutes at our tailgate! We tailgated before the game. So much fun. Weather was breezy, but great. We had a blast watching the game from a suite upstairs. Met some great people. It was a great trip and Chandler loved it. Application is in and we'll see what happens. It's just one option out of a couple. If nothing else, it was a wonderful experience.
Thanksgiving was great, even though we weren't able to get back to El Paso. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I love being with my family and friends. We had old friends over, along with Craig's dad. It was a day of football watching, being with good friends and great food.
Fast forward to now. I just finished up my second semester of nursing school. It wasn't easy. But with the support of family and good friends, I survived! Yesterday we took our final and I managed to squeak out an A for the semester. Yay...I got my A! I know I shouldn't put so much emphasis on the grade, but I do. Halfway done!
And so now, I am going to try to be on cruise control. Hoping to spend some good quality time around this house and not stress, at least until it's time to crack open the books again for N3...
Happy Friday.
I wrote about Rylee's birth story, so with Chandler's permission, I get to write a little about her. My due date for Chandler was October 25th. I stopped working right around the 15th. Doing last minute things to "get ready." On the morning of the 18th, I had taken my car in to get new tires. They ended up telling me that I needed all this other work done on the car. At the time, we could only afford the new tires, and I drove home in tears and called Craig to tell him. He got mad at me. He was mad that I would be so upset, as he figures mechanics warn you about all the things you "need" but don't really need. He came home from work and we weren't really speaking. I made dinner, had baked chocolate chip cookies from scratch and went to bed. Long story short, my water broke about midnight. We drove to the hospital still without speaking.
Once we were at the hospital and I got all situated, Craig fell asleep. OK...I guess I tried to understand and cut him some slack? It was 2:30 am, after all....
At 6:30 and with my contractions getting stronger, I decided it was time for him to WAKE UP. I had made a decision that I thought I could do this without an epidural. My doctor came in around 8:00 and I couldn't even focus on anything he was saying. I was in miserable pain. He left and my nurse strongly encouraged me to get the epidural. Around 9:30, I was begging for it. Ah...what a relief. My nurse, by the way...loved her. She was amazing and it is memories of her being with me that inspire me in my new chapter of life.
Chandler was born at 2:21 pm. After talks of possible c-section, I was able to push my little 6lb 6oz girl out. We didn't know what we were having, so this was a beautiful surprise. There were a lot of tears in that room that afternoon...
Chandler was a beautiful, sweet, quiet baby. Don't get me wrong...she cried. A lot. But, she was quiet like a mouse. Shy. Cautious. Soft spoken. Gentle. Afraid to do anything wrong. She's still very much like this to this day. More than anything, I pray that she (and Rylee, too) are happy. That Craig and I have done everything we can to raise confident, strong, caring, giving, happy girls.
I kind of worried about her 18th birthday. Her very best friend is on the east coast. Her other good friend had recently moved away, and she had just broken up with her boyfriend. Her birthday fell on a Friday. So, with about 18 of her fellow cheerleader/sisters, we all went to dinner and followed that with them cheering at the football game. It was a great night. I think she was a happy girl.
In November, Chandler and I took a trip to Norman, Oklahoma to visit the OU campus. For the longest time, Chandler has had no idea where she wants to attend college. She's a homebody. She gets homesick and a little nervous being away from home. But, the more we talked about it, the greater her interest in OU became. I figured it was worth a trip for her to see what a bigger school was like.
It was a great mom-daughter trip. We stayed with our dear friends, the Youngs. Craig's sister, Jana, drove us around Norman and attended the tour with us. Friends (the Johnsons) we met in Tulsa met us for lunch and the tour, as well. My dear friend,Traci, from Texas Tech happened to be in town, as well, and met up with me for a quick 15 minutes at our tailgate! We tailgated before the game. So much fun. Weather was breezy, but great. We had a blast watching the game from a suite upstairs. Met some great people. It was a great trip and Chandler loved it. Application is in and we'll see what happens. It's just one option out of a couple. If nothing else, it was a wonderful experience.
Thanksgiving was great, even though we weren't able to get back to El Paso. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I love being with my family and friends. We had old friends over, along with Craig's dad. It was a day of football watching, being with good friends and great food.
Fast forward to now. I just finished up my second semester of nursing school. It wasn't easy. But with the support of family and good friends, I survived! Yesterday we took our final and I managed to squeak out an A for the semester. Yay...I got my A! I know I shouldn't put so much emphasis on the grade, but I do. Halfway done!
And so now, I am going to try to be on cruise control. Hoping to spend some good quality time around this house and not stress, at least until it's time to crack open the books again for N3...
Happy Friday.
Friday, October 5, 2012
Update
And just like that, the 6th week of school is behind us. Hallelujah. And in the last few weeks, I have opened up this blog and attempted to write something. But, my mind goes blank. So, I've gathered my thoughts and here's my summary:
I love it. I hate it. It's scary. It's exciting. Yesterday was so fun! Today sucked. I feel accomplished! I feel defeated. I think: "I get it." I think: "WTF am I doing here?"
Do I sound like Sybil?
This particular week I found myself not enjoying nursing school AT ALL. And not for any particular reason ...just everything seemed to snowball at once. Emotionally and physically exhausted. And I worried that if I said this out loud, does that mean I shouldn't be there? I know the answer to this already. If this were easy, then everyone would be doing it, right??? Some days are more challenging and frustrating than others and we press on, right? I am making an extra effort to say goodbye to the over-achiever who lives inside of me. For now she is gone, but she might come back for a visit, if I let her. Wish me luck on that one.
My clinical rotation is at JFK this semester. Worlds apart from Eisenhower in many ways. I find the nurses at JFK much more willing and happy to help the students. They all seem to be very happy working there. There are some amazing nurses whom I am inspired and encouraged by...only being out of school for a couple of years and being the rock stars that they are.
I have had several Spanish speaking only patients. So much for the Spanish I thought I knew....
In other news...the girls are staying busy with school and their schedules. Chandler has turned a 180 and now seems excited about the idea of going away to college. Today we booked a flight and are going to visit OU next month. She seems beyond excited about this. Also high on the list is moving to South Carolina for school. I cannot even imagine her being so far. Two weeks ago, I found out that I was awarded 4 scholarships for my nursing program. I vaguely remember applying for them, as I didn't think I qualified for any of them. I was ecstatic. Now, if only Chandler can manage to do the same! Otherwise, how the heck do we pay for her college?? Obama says he has made college more affordable....really? For who and where? Scary.
So, it's a Friday night and tonight I skip the away game. t.i.r.e.d. So, just chilling at home and re-charging so I can focus on writing a research paper this weekend. I'm excited about that. Really. Excited. Not.
Happy Weekend.
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